


somebody to you

by transit (dollyeo)



Series: ABO AU [2]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - College/University, Emotional Constipation, M/M, Romantic Comedy, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-18
Updated: 2017-08-27
Packaged: 2018-12-16 21:15:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11837199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dollyeo/pseuds/transit
Summary: Soonyoung has a few epiphanies about Wonwoo and his fingers. He blames everything on Junhui.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thelaziesthufflepuff](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelaziesthufflepuff/gifts).



It’s been three days since Wonwoo’s been out of the apartment.

Three days since Soonyoung’s phone ran out of batteries and he’d left it unplugged, uncharged. Three days since Junhui had let himself in with a spare set of keys and cooed at him when Soonyoung asked him where Wonwoo was. Three days, and the tight knot of constant arousal and the heat-induced fog in Soonyoung’s head has already dissipated into the kind of restlessness borne from fatigue and boredom, so much so that even jerking off already feels like a chore. His wrist hurts, and his fingers are probably blistering, chafed from when he’d run out of lube and slick; every cell in his body is screaming at him, and it’s all Junhui’s fault.

And biology. But mostly Junhui.

Soonyoung slowly creeps out of his comforter, the cool air a welcome respite from the muggy, sweltering heat, the sweat, the slick. This is the grossest he’s felt in months, and he hasn’t even gotten laid to compensate. His head hurts. His hand hurts. His _dick_ feels like it’s going to fall off if anyone so much as touches it, even Wonwoo with his annoyingly prissy mouth and his equally annoying fingers and —

He bangs his head against the mattress, cursing. Fucking Wen Junhui.

He tries to crawl out of bed and into the bathroom, legs wobbling the entire time. He makes a face at the shower curtain laying on the tiled floors, abandoned haphazardly with the hooks when he’d gripped too hard and yanked it off the rod while he’d tried to get himself off with the shower head just the other night. The thing about not stocking up on any toys whatsoever is that he kind of has to be creative, not if he wants to skeevily order something off the Internet and run the risk of Wonwoo potentially seeing it at some point in time and making fun of him for it. Soonyoung _knows_ how Wonwoo’s mind works. He’d keep it as blackmail fodder hanging over Soonyoung’s head, let Soonyoung’s paranoia spike and then warily rest into a slow lull of false comfort _until_ they’d have brunch with Soonyoung’s older sister (or worse, his _mother_ ) and Wonwoo would sneakily allude to the entire time like the damn tattletale he is, existing if only to make Soonyoung’s life’s hard. Soonyoung doesn’t trust that little shit. Why’d he even move in with him again?

He feels around for the bidet, and then blinks at it. Oh. Right. Better amenities, but horrifically expensive going solo. Fuck the rising price of real estate forever.

Getting into the shower is a feat of strength and willpower comparable to that time Soonyoung dragged Seokmin and Mingyu with him to try out boxing and crossfit, only to promptly quit after three sessions. Wonwoo had ended up laughing at him while Soonyoung whined at him to stick Salonpas all over his aching joints and serve him hand and foot like an invalid (which, technically, he was), but at least having Wonwoo around had its uses; the accompanying bubble bath Wonwoo wound up giving him had been mildly humiliating and excruciating as it was a welcome respite from not showering for a couple of days, but now he didn’t have anyone to towel him down or even keep him upright.

He glares at the tiled walls in front of him, and grabs Wonwoo’s bottle of shampoo. And then he uses up the last of his body wash, because why the fuck not.

He doesn’t know what irrational part of his brain keeps pinning the blame on Wonwoo, as if it’s all Wonwoo’s fault Soonyoung’s had to single-handedly suffer through his heat (because it’s _not_ , fuck you, Junhui). The more rational, pragmatic side of him understands, even feels _grateful_ for his absence, but the tiny part of Soonyoung that’s always been a little bit dumb and a little self-absorbed is just pissed off at Wonwoo.

It’s all Junhui’s fault, really. Ever since he’d sent Soonyoung that damn message about _Wonwoo_ and his stupid fucking appendages, Soonyoung’s been in constant hell. It was bad enough that Soonyoung had nursed the (admittedly very tiny! And insignificant!) crush on Jeon Wonwoo ever since he’d shot up a few centimeters and finally learned how to dress (passably) well, but now he can't stop thinking about Wonwoo's fingers on him, above him, _inside_ him, holy fuck, since when did _Wonwoo's hand_ look so hot?

He groans and turns off the hot water, shifting hastily to freezing temperatures. And here he thought he wouldn’t be able to get a hard-on again until half a year later. Fan-fucking-tastic.

Half an hour of trying to fuck himself with his fingers and another for the accompanying wallowing and self-loathing that follows later, he’s (barely) dressed and contemplating his laundry basket. The sheets and pillowcases he’d stripped off of his bed are still salvageable, at least, but it reeks of so much cum and slick that Soonyoung has to fight the reflexive need to gag at the smell. Yeah, definitely a good idea to not have Wonwoo around anytime soon. He’d probably pinch a pillowcase between his fingers and wrinkle his nose at Soonyoung, the twitch speaking volumes of so much judgment Soonyoung will want to crawl into the washing machine and stay there forever. He sorts the whites and the colors into separate piles and decides a single wash and a cap of liquid detergent probably won’t be enough to conceal all traces of his shame.

He’d started charging his phone while wrangling with his pile of laundry, so it’s already lighting up with delayed (annoying) incoming messages and (equally annoying) notifications. He thumbs through Chan’s whining status updates about the tragic last stretch of his exams, and Minghao’s recent documentation of Seokmin and Mingyu’s combined productivity in stress cooking at the expense of finals. Soonyoung’s just glad he got the last of his exams out of the way before he got hit with his heat; he knows Wonwoo’s isn’t over until the end of the week, and from the scattered mess of notes and papers across the living room floor, he probably went on a mad scramble trying to get his shit together before getting out of their apartment.

A pang of guilt settles into Soonyoung’s stomach, heavy as stone, and he grimaces. Must be heart burn. Or gas. Huh.

 _I’m alive_ , he texts Wonwoo, intent on ignoring the slew of suggestive messages he keeps getting from the rest of the assholes he calls his friends. _You can drag your sorry ass back home now. I’m in no danger of jumping you any time soon._

And because Soonyoung is a fucking idiot that types faster than he can think, he follows it up with: _Unless you wanna get jumped?_ and immediately regrets it.

He sees the tiny 1 pop up right beside his message, and he bites the inside of his cheek, stomach a tangle of knots and fluttering with coiled tension as he waits for a reply that doesn’t come in the next minute. And the next.

After a moment, he adds. _lol_. Still nothing.

He lets out a frustrated yell and pulls his phone out of the charger, making his way back to check on his laundry.

It’s cool though – isn’t it? He and Wonwoo have been joking around since they were young, constantly making fun of each other going through puberty and dealing with all the unwanted hormones and feelings that came with it. Before he’d even started thinking about Wonwoo maybe wrestling him into submission in increasingly sexual ways, he’d been talking shit at Wonwoo for as long as he could remember. And Wonwoo always gave as good as he got.

 _Well, that was before you started thinking with your dick, idiot_ , he tells himself, glaring at the bottle of bleach and wishing he could drown himself with it. Word vomiting’s never gotten Soonyoung anywhere good, especially around Wonwoo. Great. He’s probably ruined everything, and they’ll be cage-y and awkward around each other for so many days Soonyoung will want to stab himself with a pair of chopsticks just to end the misery, and then _Wonwoo_ will either hide out in his own room or seek asylum in someone else’s apartment and Soonyoung will have to find a new roommate and a new best friend and—

He lets his head rest on his kneecaps, groaning. Okay, maybe Wonwoo won’t leave him high and dry with rent, but they’ll definitely be super awkward.

It’ll be just like that time in high school when he and Wonwoo had the biggest fight they’d ever had – it was over something stupid, Soonyoung can’t remember much of it anymore, but Wonwoo had given him the cold shoulder for the longest time ever and it had felt like hell, having Wonwoo so near him but unmoving, indifferent. And then Wonwoo had started _avoiding_ him, and it had extended past summer vacation and into the stretch of the first week back at school, which _sucked_. He and Wonwoo _always_ went to school and made their way home together, and Wonwoo was always the one a little more put-together, less forgetful, so he always had an umbrella in his bag when Soonyoung didn’t. It rained a lot, that first week. He’d never remembered to even bring an umbrella with him, the whole time.

They’d made up, though. They always do, even though they keep bickering so much Jihoon keeps threatening to murder them in cold blood if they don’t shut up every time. He tries to hold on to that spark of assurance, even as his chest constricts and heaves with something heavy. Aching.

His phone lights up with a message, and he almost stumbles as he reaches forward to grab at it. It’s not from Wonwoo, though, which makes Soonyoung’s hopeful smile fall. Instead, it’s Jihoon.

 _Wonwoo just spilled a hot cup of coffee all over his lap and now he’s making noises like he’s dying_ , says Jihoon. _What did you do_?

 _Nothing???_ Soonyoung texts back.

 _Somehow, I don’t believe you_ , says Jihoon. _Whatever. I’m sending him home since you’re apparently coherent enough to live in denial. Just don’t break him, he has a test tomorrow._

 _I’ll break your face_ , Soonyoung threatens, and throws his phone into the laundry hamper, suddenly put out. That ball of guilt in his stomach expands, just as his mood sinks. Soonyoung already _knows_ Wonwoo has, like, zero attraction in him whatsoever, but it doesn’t really do wonders to his ego when Wonwoo reacts like he’d rather get stabbed than even contemplate Soonyoung’s (non-existent!!! Impossible!!!) advances.

He hates this feeling.

He tries to take his mind off of it by distracting himself with a dating sim chock-ful of DILFs he’d wanted to purchase as a gag gift for Jisoo but ended up genuinely enjoying himself. It’s how Wonwoo finds him later on, laptop braced on his lap as he tries to woo the best friend archetype (and failing) while waiting for the dryer to stop. Soonyoung doesn’t notice him until Wonwoo makes a sound akin to Soonyoung’s pet cat when someone accidentally steps on her tail; he’d make fun of him for it, but Soonyoung makes an equally embarrassing noise in his shock.

“Holy shit,” says Soonyoung, slamming his laptop screen shut, like he’s hiding a porn video from Wonwoo. Which. He isn’t. Dirty talking and flirting with a fictional character is _not_ pornography, kids. “What did I tell you about being a creeper, Wonwoo-yah?

“Not to,” Wonwoo croaks out, on autopilot. Wonwoo looks him up and down, and something in his expression flickers, wavering. His throat sounds hoarse when he speaks, gutted, like he’s in excruciating pain. Drama queen. “Why are you wearing my clothes?”

Soonyoung looks down at the old, ratty tank top and the pair of boxer briefs he may or may not have borrowed (stolen) from Wonwoo’s closet. “I ran out of clean clothes,” says Soonyoung, fidgeting. “Sorry.”

Wonwoo closes his eyes, hissing under his breath. “Generally, when people need things, they _ask_ first, Soonyoung,” he grumbles. “A little warning would have been nice.”

”If it matters so much, I’ll just go naked then,” Soonyoung scoffs. Wonwoo looks even _more_ panicked at that, and shakes his head with more force than Soonyoung’s ever seen him.

“Never mind,” says Wonwoo, even if Soonyoung _knows_ Wonwoo hates sharing his things to the point that he’d even once yanked his jeans off of Bohyuk right before his brother’s date. “No one needs to see that.”

 _Well, glad you think I’m so hideous you’d rather let me use your stuff than see me without any pants on_ , he thinks. But Wonwoo blinks blearily at him and looks so _tired_ that Soonyoung doesn’t have the heart to fight him anymore.

It’s days like this that he just wants to wrap Wonwoo up in the softest blankets he owns and ply him with all the warm drinks and comfort food until he falls asleep, sated and content. Wonwoo doesn’t look like he’s had much sleep, exams aside; Soonyoung knows that Wonwoo has this thing about not feeling comfortable in places he doesn’t really call home – it’s the only reason Wonwoo didn’t really stay at the dorms with Soonyoung in the first couple of years of uni, preferring to stay over at his aunt’s house five or six train stops away. The first night they’d moved in, Soonyoung had to sleep beside him in a makeshift blanket fort in the living room, just to get him to stop fussing. It’s equal parts frustrating and cute, even though Soonyoung would rather die than tell him that.

The guilt creeps up in his stomach again, crawling. He swallows down his pride, and sets his laptop aside.

“Hey,” he says, instead, looking Wonwoo in the eye. “We’re okay, right?“

Wonwoo doesn’t look away, at least, which means he’s taking Soonyoung seriously. When they were younger, he was so shy maintaining eye contact was next to impossible. He’s learned, over the years, to just keep his head up and fake it till he makes it, just like Soonyoung. At least his poker face is convincing enough, Soonyoung thinks. 

Like right now: Wonwoo’s face is so unreadable, but Soonyoung knows all his tells. How he keeps his hands crossed over his chest, his fingers fussing at his sleeves, feigned impatience for nervousness. How his knuckles are so white Soonyoung wants to hold them. His jaw, clenched, his lips set into a firm line. He looks like he wants to cross over to Soonyoung and just– do something. Anything.

He doesn’t, though; he just lets his shoulders sag, keeping head bowed, and he sighs.

Soonyoung knows that sigh. He’s heard it, just a few times in his life, and they’ve never led to anything Soonyoung wants to hear. Once, when Soonyoung had gotten him to ask a girl out in freshman year of high school, the other when Soonyoung had introduced him to his first boyfriend and asked him what he’d thought about him.

“Yeah,” Wonwoo lies through his teeth, a strange smile plastered on his face, so fake Soonyoung can't stand it. “We’re okay.”

And that’s how Soonyoung realizes, with a slow, sinking feeling, that maybe they’ll never go back to being the same ever again.


	2. Chapter 2

"Have you seen Wonwoo-hyung around?"

Soonyoung looks up from his readings, pencil unattractively sticking out between his teeth. It's a nasty habit he's never quite outgrown, but he often argues that it's infinitely better than Wonwoo's thumb sucking phase in preschool. Soonyoung has receipts. Oral fixations have, apparently, been ingrained in both of them for as long as he can remember.

He pointedly does _not_ let _that_ line of thought extend further. Bad thoughts, he reminds himself. No thinking inappropriate things about Wonwoo as a jailbait, _nope_. That's just _wrong_ , and unwanted, and _urgh_. No.

"Dunno," says Soonyoung. He feels a pang of irritation when he loses track of his page, but if he's being honest, he'd been reading without really absorbing anything in the past half hour he'd been holed up in the library. For some reason, he's been feeling pricklier than usual, even more than during pre-heat. He wonders if post-heat hormonal imbalances are a thing now. "Why are you asking me?"

"Because you're his roommate?" Seungkwan says, taking a seat across him, unprompted. "And you two are, like, always together. Or something."

Seokmin, trailing after Seungkwan, snorts and settles down in the empty seat right beside Soonyoung. He slings an arm around him, and Soonyoung resists the urge to throw all his notes at both of them, if only for their matching shit-eating grins. "Or _something_ ," he agrees. "That's definitely putting it lightly."

"I'm not his babysitter," says Soonyoung, scathing, before shrugging him off. Seokmin laughs and vacates the seat before Soonyoung could hit him, and crawls over to Seungkwan instead, self-preservation instincts apparently still in tact. "Go away, you brats. I'm trying to focus."

"You've been staring at the same page for five minutes," Seungkwan points out. "We've been keeping count."

"Not everyone can be a speed reader like _Jeon Wonwoo_ ," says Soonyoung, injecting as much irritation in it as possible. It doesn't seem to faze Seungkwan at all, and just completely passes over Seokmin's head.

"Yeah, because you keep making him read stuff out loud for you instead," says Seungkwan. He touches a hand over his chest, right where he thinks his heart probably is, and Soonyoung's almost a hundred percent sure it's really not, because all of his friends are heartless when they make fun of each other. "It's -- what's the word I'm looking for again?"

"Romantic," Seokmin supplies, unhelpfully. Seungkwan looks like he's mulling it over for a second, before shaking his head.

"Nauseating," Seungkwan decides, instead.

Favorite underclassmen or not, Soonyoung still throws his pens at them for good measure. Seokmin just laughs and bats him away, but Seungkwan makes a face akin to Wonwoo's every time he has to deal with something unbearably tedious and possibly repulsive to his soul.

"Gross," says Seungkwan. "I have no idea where _those_ have been."

"You saying I have a dirty mouth, Boo Seungkwan?"

" _Wonwoo-hyung_ would know," says Seungkwan. Soonyoung hits him with an eraser, this time, and gets him on the cheek.

"Stop that," Soonyoung demands. His mind flashes back to the increasingly suggestive innuendos in the group chat, with every other line making Soonyoung want the earth to swallow him up and possibly destroy Wonwoo's phone in the process, too. He's had one too many times contemplating throwing Wonwoo's phone out of the window every time Junhui _and_ Jeonghan titter at him. "Don't make things _weird_. It's already awkward without you guys egging me on."

"I'm not the one who fluttered his eyelashes at his roommate and asked him to dick me," says Seungkwan, making Seokmin erupt into a peal of laughter that has the library assistant scowling at them. Dick.

"I never said that," Soonyoung insists. "Who told you that? Was it Junhui? Because I have yet to kick his ass."

He cracks his knuckles, except he's never really been good at this whole intimidation thing, not like Wonwoo who just has to _look_ at someone with the blandest expression and have them think he's out to stab them, or eat them, or maybe both. Wonwoo's just never been really great at looking approachable.

Unfortunately, even the traitorous underclassmen he's taken under his wing just look at him like he's as threatening as the puny watermelon eraser he'd thrown at Seungkwan. It isn't even _his_ , he'd just stolen it from Wonwoo's desk, god damn it! (Never mind that he'd given it to Wonwoo as a gag gift on his birthday, too. Shut up. He's just making good use of all his useless Daiso purchases by dumping them all on Wonwoo.)

"Hyung knows martial arts," says Seokmin. "And he's bigger than you, so."

"I can take him," Soonyoung brags. "I know taekwondo, _and_ I've pounded Wonwoo's ass lots of times."

He already knows he's phrased it poorly by Seungkwan and Seokmin mirroring each other's raised eyebrows. "Oh, fuck off," he grouses. "Stop tainting my childhood memories with your perverted thoughts!"

"We weren't saying anything," says Seokmin, holding his hands up.

Seungkwan snorts. "And even if we _were_ thinking it, you just make it so easy--"

"I hate you both," says Soonyoung. He lets his head rest against the surface of the table, lower lip sticking out. "I'll kick Jihoon's ass, then, but only _after_ I'm done with you two."

"Don't take it out on us, hyung," says Seungkwan, with nothing but mock sympathy. "It's not our fault you and Wonwoo-hyung are the most awkward human beings on this planet."

"It wasn't awkward before you assholes made it awkward," Soonyoung mutters, and really, it wasn't! Sure, he and Wonwoo had danced around each other for a bit the first few hours after _officially_ moving in with each other, but then Soonyoung had reorganized the contents of Wonwoo's bookshelf to make room for his own manga and they'd fallen into their normal bickering like it was nothing.

(And, okay, maybe that time Soonyoung woke up to Wonwoo drooling on his nape in his sleep and his morning wood the day after _could_ have been a disaster, but it wasn't! Shut up!)

God, this was the worst. He'd lived his whole life thinking about Wonwoo's dick in the context of 'oh, we used to share bath times and see each other's tiny pee-pees in the sauna before we even hit puberty' kind of way, and it hadn't really been anything but an abstract source of blackmail fodder at the back of Soonyoung's head, saved for a special occasion of embarrassing Wonwoo at, like, his future wedding or _something_. He _wasn't_ supposed to even be contemplating the size and girth of it. How it would feel doing more than brush against the back of his thigh, maybe push up against the hem of his shorts and--

"Whatever it is you're thinking about, can you please _stop_ because we can smell it on you," says Seungkwan, expression pinched. Soonyoung whines and hides his face under his hands.

"Is this what karmic retribution feels like?" Soonyoung wonders. Why do bad things even happen to good people, anyway? "Am I being punished for all those times I teased him about all his exes before -- because I _swear_ those never lasted more than a week!"

And it's true -- as far as Soonyoung remembers, Wonwoo's always been the type to just date a bit and then break it off just as quickly as it starts. Soonyoung doesn't even bother memorizing names and faces at this point -- after the first few crying high school girls and heartbroken _boys_ , he's just come to terms with the fact that Wonwoo might be a bit of a love 'em and leave 'em kind of person, not really one to settle down with anyone with his impossibly high standards, or a tendency to lose interest after obsessing and fixating for a short period of time.

Okay, so maybe he's just projecting with that last bit. Not like Soonyoung's own flings last much longer, what with Soonyoung falling hard and fast and then fizzling out soon after. The longest he'd ever stayed with a person was with his first boyfriend in high school, and even then he'd broken it off before they'd even gotten past third base when he'd realized exactly how much of a dick he could be, talking shit about Wonwoo to Soonyoung's face. Only _Soonyoung_ could talk smack about Wonwoo and get away with it.

It's funny. His boyfriend had been so jealous of Wonwoo, then, and it hadn't helped that Soonyoung's default mode was to blab on like an idiot about him when he was nervous. Like, say, when someone else had a hand fiddling at the zipper of his pants. "If you like him so much, why don't you just go out with _him_ instead," he'd said, lip curling downward, displeased. "The way you keep talking about him makes me wonder if you're actually in love with _him_."

Soonyoung had felt something cold and icy settle into his stomach, seething, and he'd tugged on the rest of his clothes and left his ex with an unflattering bruise on his jaw just for that comment. He'd been so, so angry then, fury mixed with churning embarrassment and a pinch of relief that they hadn't gotten any further than they had; he'd gone home in a shitty mood, the onset of rain not improving matters at all, and Wonwoo had shown up like some god damn drama protagonist with his stupid umbrella and. Well. Who could blame Soonyoung for bursting into tears then and there?

Maybe now he should give his ex-boyfriend a gift basket and a belated apology, what with how accurate he is how many years later. Except Soonyoung's not in love with Wonwoo. He isn't. He just wants his dick. And his fingers. Preferably with both of them in him.

He crosses his legs, arousal stirring in his stomach along with shame. He can already feel the loaded weight of Seungkwan's judgmental gaze, and he _hates_ it. It's not his fault he's thinking about sex at least once a day, everyday. He's a young, healthy uni kid in his prime -- what kind of guy his age _isn't_ wanking in his spare time?

And. Well. Wonwoo isn't bad to look at, is easy on the eyes, even. When they were younger, it was always Wonwoo that got the love letters, the confessions behind the school building, the chocolates in February. And Soonyoung had been happy for him, ecstatic, even, that his taciturn best friend apparently had a chance at not spending the rest of his life alone and lonely with only Soonyoung to check up on him everyday to see if he was still breathing while buried under his books and manhwa, subsisting on video games, 2D dating sims, and instant noodles his whole life, the loser.

(And if he were jealous at some point, just a teeny bit, once in their life -- well. No one's prying that secret out of Soonyoung any time soon. _Especially_ not the jackass he calls his friends.)

Seokmin gives Seungkwan a _look_ , forestalling possibly anything crude or insulting. Or possibly both. "Well," he starts, voice calm and even, like he's trying to be sympathetic, "do you ever think about the reason why Wonwoo-hyung's relationships never really last?"

"Because he's a cynical idiot with a phobia for commitment," says Soonyoung, without missing a beat. Seokmin pinches the bridge of his nose, and Seungkwan just props his chin on his palms.

"Isn't that you?" Seungkwan comments, squinting at him.

"Pot, meet kettle," says Soonyoung, kicking Seungkwan's shin under the table and relishing in his pained yell. The library assistant hisses at them to _please_ shut up, and Soonyoung watches Seungkwan sink into his seat, mortified.

"I'm a perfectly functioning young adult navigating the waters of the dating sea," says Seungkwan. "Cut me some slack. Not all of us can meet the love of their life in _preschool_."

He looks at Soonyoung the entire time he says it, like he's trying to channel some kind of message to Soonyoung. Too bad that it just looks like he's suffering from emotional constipation trying. Soonyoung just scratches the back of his head.

"That sounds like some bullshit Wonwoo would eat up," says Soonyoung. "Then again, he's practically an overly sentimental and idealistic loser that still believes in stuff like having a one true love."

Soonyoung almost gags at the thought. Wonwoo keeps watching horrible and cringe-worthy dramas like an ahjumma, a guilty pleasure he's always forced Soonyoung to sit through with him regardless of Soonyoung's complaints. It's practically ingrained in his system to be a dweeb.

Soonyoung doesn't really get why people think that all of the romantic comedies in their shared hard drive is Soonyoung's -- it's not like Soonyoung even likes anything other than watching stuff blow up, or people getting blown in seedy bathrooms, or a combination of both. It's Wonwoo that always has a roll of tissue on hand for excessively melodramatic tearjerkers that Soonyoung always manages to fall asleep on, curled up against Wonwoo on the couch or in bed and going cross-eyed at all the boring stuff. He just doesn't get the appeal.

Wonwoo, though, keeps making him watch it every time they can. It's practically a ritual at this point, even if they haven't exactly done it lately, not with Wonwoo's exams and Soonyoung's. Well. His heat. Something tells Soonyoung that he can at least expect a bit of reprieve from the mind-numbing and soul-sucking surrender to the primetime TV gods, even if he _does_ miss all the snacking.

And making fun of Wonwoo's red-rimmed eyes and clogged up nose from all the crying. It's always a bonus to see him come undone. What a sap.

" _Exactly_ ," says Seokmin, his voice cutting through Soonyoung's thoughts like a particularly jarring knife at his brain, poking incessantly and making it pound. "Now, what do you think this says about you two?"

If this were one of those romantic comedies Soonyoung suffers through constantly, this would be the part where everything finally clicks in and Soonyoung spontaneously decides he's been in love with Wonwoo all along, ever since they were children that didn't know any better. And then they could maybe fall into each other's arms and make out all night without the threat of Wonwoo flunking his impending exam hanging over their shoulders, because that was how romantic comedies went, right? Couples completely ignoring the rest of the world while they were stuck in their self-absorbed cloud of half-lust, half-love.

Because this is not a romantic comedy, however, Soonyoung just blinks, stares right back at Seokmin and Seungkwan's expectant gazes, and then lets something completely different click into his mind with dawning horror.

"That Wonwoo is the biggest prude alive and I'll never get him to sleep with me at this rate," he moans into his palms. The atmosphere around him drops as quickly as the faintest spark of hope in him dies with a sizzle. "He's probably saving himself for marriage, or _something_. No wonder he never brings _anyone_ home!"

Seokmin looks like he wants nothing more than to hit his head against the table, and Seungkwan like he's eaten something sour. The looks of shared epiphanies, apparently. Soonyoung can commiserate, except he doesn't look as stupid as these two do, he hopes, internal turmoil and secondhand guilt aside.

"I should probably start setting him up again," says Soonyoung. All this time, he's just been thinking about _his_ dick, and not even about his best friend. Now he just feels like an asshole. "Do you guys know anyone he could be into?"

Seokmin looks at Seungkwan, at a loss for words, for once, and Seungkwan purses his lips.

"Yeah," says Seungkwan, eyebrows arched impossibly high. "I can think of someone right about now."

"Gimme their number, then, dork." Seungkwan makes a face, but picks up his phone anyway. A moment later, Soonyoung gets a message on his phone. "Hey, this is _my_ number!"

" _Exactly_ ," says Seungkwan, the little brat.

"Yah, stop joking around, Boo Seungkwan," Soonyoung scolds him. "Come on, give me something good. Nice omega from a good family, maybe a little bit on the sweet and cheerful side to balance out Wonwoo's depressingly boring idea of small talk. I need their dates to be salvageable, not a one-time thing."

"What makes you think I'm even kidding?" Seungkwan squawks. Soonyoung lets out an aggrieved sigh.

"You're useless to me," Soonyoung decides. He turns to Seokmin instead. "How about you, Seokmin-ah? Know anyone that won't be scared off by Wonwoo's resting bitch face?"

"Um," says Seokmin. "Hyung, I don't think you understand--"

"Right, I forgot," says Soonyoung, "no one can stand Wonwoo's bitch faces except for me."

"So date him then!" Seungkwan whisper-yells.

Soonyoung makes a face. "Why would I _date_ him? He's the worst!"

"I thought you wanted him to dick you down to get it out of your system," Seungkwan points out.

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean I want to date him!"

"You're practically living together and going out all the time," says Seungkwan, growing red in the face. He's getting so worked up about this, he must really hate losing an argument, Soonyoung thinks. "You share _everything_ with each other! _You literally have each other saved with hearts at the end of your names on your phones_!"

"It's called an inside joke, Seungkwan, a concept that you _clearly_ have no understanding of," says Soonyoung, waving him away. "Keep up!"

Seungkwan bangs his head on the table. Seokmin winces, but pats him on the back.

"I think you and Wonwoo-hyung would be good for each other, though," Seokmin pipes up with a tentative smile. "Being together for so long and living together now -- it shouldn't be out of the realm of possibility, should it?"

The thing Soonyoung likes best about Seokmin is that he tends to think the best about every person, and he's so unfailingly optimistic that it's almost borderline naivete talking. Of course Seokmin would say something like it. He clearly hasn't seen how, in the span of how many weeks of living together, Soonyoung and Wonwoo are so bad at living together like decent adults that it's laughable. They're lazy with chores. They keep putting off cleaning unless they absolutely have to. They have a tendency to undercook or burn anything requiring a pan and a stove, so they have a stock of instant noodles and frozen meals stowed away for easy microwaving. They can't even keep a pet at home, because Soonyoung wants a puppy and Wonwoo's always been a bit jumpy around dogs, and Wonwoo keeps vouching for a cat but Soonyoung doesn't want to deal with a tinier version of Wonwoo, all prickly and demanding and prone to torturing Soonyoung at turns.

It's definitely far from domestic.

Junhui's also teased him about the same thing, once, though -- about how moving in together comes right before marriage, because alphas and omegas, they don't work like that. They're either something, or nothing. There's the heats. And there's the ruts. And then there's just the _possibility_ of it all.

But they don't get it, not really. He and Wonwoo, they aren't really like that. He's known Wonwoo for most of his life, is the thing. He knows Wonwoo like the back of his hand, can trace his own history with Wonwoo's, entangled together like unruly vines, and what he feels for Wonwoo isn't anything like all the cheesy dramas. Maybe he'll hold Wonwoo's hand while they're watching TV on a boring Tuesday night, but it doesn't spark anything in him, doesn't set his stomach afire and aflutter and make his palms sweat with excitement. Maybe he'll let Wonwoo offer him an umbrella in the rain, breaking whatever silly Cold War they've started to tell him he looks ugly when he cries, but not before asking, very calmly, if it's time to beat any jackass boyfriends up for breaking his heart. Maybe.

That stirring in Soonyoung's gut when he thinks about Wonwoo, though -- it's just want, just desire, nothing like infatuation. It's not that he doesn't love Wonwoo, because he _does_. It's just that he's not _in_ love with him.

(Not yet.)

"Maybe if Wonwoo magically turned into someone from Shinee, then I would consider it," says Soonyoung, loftily.

"Why, god, why," Seungkwan groans. "Why must I be surrounded by dumbasses." Hypocrite.

"I finally understand why Wonwoo-hyung is always suffering," says Seokmin, with a sigh. He looks at Seungkwan a little helplessly, all optimism apparently wrung out. " _This_ is why."

"Excuse you, I make a great wingman," says Soonyoung. Except when he gets drunker than Wonwoo and starts grinding against anything and everything, but no one needs to know that. It's not his fault he's a slutty drunk. Wonwoo hasn't complained yet, even if he _does_ end up having to shepherd Soonyoung everywhere and play at being his pretend boyfriend just to get handsy alphas to back off. It's a Thing.

(Though, honestly, Soonyoung has no idea why anyone that even wants to get into Soonyoung's pants would be fended off by _Wonwoo_. He's, like, the least useful person in a fight, when you strip away his perennial state of looking displeased with anything and everything. He isn't _that_ scary, no matter what anyone says. If Soonyoung really wants to, he could go home with anyone, any time, any day! Fuck Wonwoo for looking so smug everytime he has to drag him out of a club and pack him into an overpriced cab to take him home.

In retrospect, having someone to take care of him on a bad night had seemed like a really compelling reason to move in with Wonwoo. And then some.)

"Okay, so I haven't exactly found him anyone when we go out, but I will!" Soonyoung insists. "Eventually. After I hold his hand through him wallowing about maybe flunking from all his classes, because he's such a drama queen."

"More like, a pitiful loser with a self-sabotaging cockblocker at his side," Seungkwan mutters, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

"Hey, it's not _my_ fault Wonwoo's practically the pickiest person I know," says Soonyoung. "Lucky for him, I'm the most stubborn matchmaker in existence. He's got no escape."

Seokmin and Seungkwan just stare at him, speechless.

"What?" Soonyoung asks. "What is it?"

"Nothing, hyung," says Seokmin, with a pained smile as Seungkwan lets out a frustrated, garbled sigh and stalks away, muttering, _we tried, Wonwoo-hyung, we really tried but your type just had to be dumb,_ god damn it! (Soonyoung worries about that kid. He's been hanging around Minghao too much. He may or may not need some anger management classes in the near future.) "You're just really amazing, you know that?"

"I know," says Soonyoung, beaming at him. "I'm the greatest." He unlocks his phone, and thinks about _finally_ reviving that dating profile he'd made for Wonwoo as a joke. Maybe this will finally help Wonwoo get that stick out of the ass, and then hopefully make Soonyoung's sudden thirst for him miraculously disappear once he's taken and mated. "Now help me find a picture of Wonwoo that _isn't_ embarrassing. I need to find my best friend a date."

 

 

 _Soonyoung, why is Seungkwan sending me crying gifs out of nowhere_? Wonwoo messages him half an hour later, after Seokmin and Seungkwan had abandoned him to piece together Wonwoo's dating profile, citing their desire to keep their balls in tact in case Wonwoo finds out. Wusses. _And why do I keep getting spam mail about dating apps and spicing up my non-existent sex life? What are you_ doing?

Even through text, Soonyoung can smell the dread and fear on Wonwoo. Perfect. No one gets back into the dating world without wanting to throw up a little every time. This is just, like, compensation for all those unwanted _feelings_ Soonyoung's gotten about Wonwoo's _anything_ in the past few days. He deserves a little suffering.

 _You're welcome, babe_ , Soonyoung texts back, cackling, and rubs his hands together as he starts looking for Wonwoo's perfect match. It shouldn't be too hard, right?

Right?

(Wrong.)

**Author's Note:**

> hongwen: mentions childhood marriage promises in the context of abo au  
> me: writes fic at work instead of doing work, thanks


End file.
